my family think i'm losing my mind

but maybe i keep it where they can't find it.

i carry it with me.
and i keep it on paper
everytime it gets too full
i empty it out
one
word
at
a
time
one thought to completion,
never fully completed
jumping
from one wave
to the next
without the slightest link
or at least no link
that you can see
or follow
stream of consciousness
like water flowing through rocks
each one changing the flow
disturbing the surface
leaves float by
get tossed and sunk
surface again when the water is smooth
or smoother.
who ever really has complete calm,
complete release from trials and errors
in my head
there is always some turmoil
some little piece of gravel
being turned over and over
i don't think my brain
could make a pearl
worrying that grain of sand
to a high shine
a beautiful gem
precious stone
worth something to others
but just a grain of sand to me.
by writing things down
i can't forget them
but i don't have to remember them
they are always there
always going to remind me
of what i have
and who i am
and where i've been
whilst sitting in my cahir
moving only enough muscles to write
and no more
complete concentraion
to the exclusion of everything else
but my mind
lost to you
but found to me
on paper
forever.